Do You Hear a Calling?
JOURNEY TO MY JOURNEY
I am a self-proclaimed recovering perfectionist. I first said this in a dharma talk for a yoga class several years ago as kind of a joke, but I was 100% serious. I don’t take recovery from anything lightly. I realized one morning after an entire week of trying to put my journey into words to share with you, my desire to find the “perfect” words caused me to relapse. My perfectionism was showing up in full force and I was stuck in all my old patterns. Freeze mode, flitting from one paragraph to the next never finishing a whole thought, and basically spinning my wheels and exerting oodles of anxious energy with little to show for it.
Even though it took me so long to realize this was going on, the moment I did, was the very moment I took my power back. I knew what to do. With my newfound awareness, I sat with the uncomfortable feelings and got curious. I slowed down and felt a tightness in my belly, a heaviness in my chest, a buzzing sensation from head to toes. I observed this without judgement (ok maybe a little judgement— after all, I’m not perfect). I held myself and smiled at the knowledge that oh yes, this is part of me, and it has a place here. There is wisdom within it. It serves a purpose— to keep me safe.
Instead of stuffing my feelings down, numbing them out, or feeling ashamed I was back in this place, I chose to walk, cry, laugh, and dance under the sun. This gave me the space I needed to love myself through this experience, welcome this part of me, and allow the emotions and sensations to move through me. Because I did this, the wisdom within me revealed itself. The antidote to my perfectionism is my willingness to love and accept this part of me. The words came, “I’m just going to have do this IMPERFECTLY.” Knowing how to do all of this, is exactly the reason I’m here. Ironically, it felt like the perfect place to finally move from freeze to free.
So, here we are. And here goes…something.
MY JOURNEY
I have searched all my life to understand who I am, as an individual, as well as in relation to others. I have dedicated much of my life to personal growth and spiritual development, a lot of the time my focus or my goal was trying to “fix” all the broken parts of myself. I have gone to therapy off and on starting in my twenties. When I realized I was simply going through the motions of life and I craved more depth, I found meditation and yoga in my thirties. I’ve taken classes, read books, studied the science of relationships, listened to podcasts all to become my best self and live my most authentic, wholehearted life.
From my exploration it became clear the answers I was seeking were not outside of me, but within me. I knew I was supposed to accept and love myself unconditionally. Yoga taught me to understand this at a deeper level and I became more connected to myself than in previous years, but something was still missing.
It wasn’t until my forties, when I had a life changing coaching experience that I finally FELT in my whole body, mind, and soul, a shift, and an understanding to a depth I never experienced before. I understood that this wisdom truly was inside me, and the access point to it all is acceptance and love of ALL parts of myself in a fully embodied way. I finally realized and truly believed I am not and never was broken to begin with. I knew I possessed a depth of wisdom that is limitless, and I have always been WHOLE. What makes me Divine is the total acceptance of my humanness with unconditional love.
This was the catalyst that has brought me to my newest calling: coaching.
ANSWERING THE CALL
For over a year, I have been studying the VITA (Vital and Integrated Tantric Approach) coaching methodology through the Tantric Institute of Integrated Sexuality. What I love about this methodology is it is rooted in marrying the sacred ancient wisdom of Tantra teachings with the modern science of neurobiology and nervous system regulation. This is a trauma-informed, comprehensive program that incorporates and integrates trauma healing principles in a slow, gentle and loving way, while working on developing self-love, acceptance, compassion, and confidence through joy, pleasure, and embodied practices to help clients reach their dreams and desires.
Tantra teaches us that everything we need to get where we want to go already exists within us. This wisdom does not only reside in our minds, but even more deeply in our bodies. It is through societal conditioning, life experiences, past trauma, and personal hardships that we start to limit ourselves and our beliefs about what is possible. Everything we do, everything we are, has consciousness, wisdom, and purpose. So much of what has happened in our lives exists in the unconscious realm. Traditional therapy and coaching utilize verbal processing and cognitive questioning to move us towards the life we want to live. This is critical for transformation, but it misses the mark to a large degree because it only addresses one area, our conscious mind. For true long-term change and transformation to happen, we must also address what exists in our unconscious, both in mind and body.
In the coaching process we dive deeply into identifying your desires and goals, finding clarity and exploring both the conscious and unconscious levels. Most of what stops us from realizing our dreams resides in our belief it isn’t safe to do so. This can exist at both the conscious and unconscious levels. We don’t even realize this is what causes us to self-sabotage and self-abandon. Through the coach and client relationship, we work together in co-creation to create a path towards your desire using mindfulness, movement, breath, sounding, energy, embodiment practices and nervous system regulation strategies. In this process we work to uncover and integrate the unconscious blocks that keep you from realizing your desires fully. My intention is to help you go beyond surviving your way through life and move towards cultivating space for you to embrace and embody thriving. The best part is, you are the one with the answers! I am here to simply guide you back home to your own highest essence and inner wisdom.
Some potential outcomes of the coaching process:
Transform limiting beliefs and become more empowered
Develop a deeper awareness of body/mind connection
Regulate the nervous system.
Get out of your head and into your body
Cultivate self-trust and intuition
Create internal resources and embody a sense of safety
Overcome overwhelm, feeling stuck, or a sense of living in survival mode
Develop a strong sense of wholeness through self-love, self-acceptance, and self-compassion
Incorporate and integrate past trauma that lives in the body
Manage stress with more ease and joy
Feel more pleasure, joy, fun
Develop self-confidence
Manage a life transition with more ease
Developing personalized practices to move you closer to achieving your desires.
A LITTLE MORE INFORMATION
Sessions are typically done weekly, however in certain cases, we may choose bi-weekly. Each session will be done via zoom and last approximately 60-75 minutes. Following each session, within 24 hours (likely sooner), you will receive a detailed summary and reflection of your session, as well as customized practices to enhance your transformative process and support you in reaching your desired goal. Examples include, but aren’t limited to: breathwork, meditation, specific tasks to complete, recommended reading, etc. These are entirely optional and meant to deepen your experience. In addition, I will be available for support in between sessions should you have questions or concerns along the way.
If this speaks to your soul--if you hear the calling…fill out your coaching application here.If you are curious, but not quite ready to commit, you can schedule a Complementary Coaching Connection Call (20-30 minutes Zoom call) in which I can share more about the coaching process and answer any questions you may have. Sign up here.